It may take a little practice to spot attachments (they seem so normal that they slip under the radar). Just notice a random impassioned remark you or a friend may make, and see if you can track down the investment that’s driving it. For example:
Statement |
Investment |
| “I’m bored. I gotta go to the bar.” | excitement? novelty? avoiding loneliness? |
| “She’s got to see things my way.” | being in control? |
| "I'm not showing up at HER party!" | people's approval? |
| “I spoke to him in the hall, but he looked away!" | ego (sense of self)? |
I use question marks because these remarks could be traced to different attachments in different people. Generally, though, I feel I'll be damaged if a person or thing or institution doesn’t give me what I want, feed me, support me, cooperate with my agenda. I count on them to supply me something I feel I need to survive. Inwardly (invisibly), I’m screaming with the pain of an infant who is hungry.
As Jesus’s words to the right remind us, these attachments are like treasures, and my heart is attached to (invested in) my treasures. And if they’re on earth, we’re nervous, pure and simple, because they ARE gonna fade. This law is more reliable than gravity.
Good news is, I can, little by little, put tiny bits of space between these attachments and myself. Every time I do, it’s like a little bit of heaven on earth. Guaranteed.
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy,
where thieves break in and steal.
For
where your treasure is,
there your heart will be also.
Jesus (Mark 6:21)
I make myself rich by making my wants few.
Henry David Thoreau
Walden and Civil Disobedience
Clinging to Anything,
We Shall Lose Our Way
Roger Hickin, Auckland, NZ
(Oedipus Rex Gallery)
Attachments are like investing. I place something I value into the hands of someone or something else because I expect to profit (i.e., get back more than I put in).
Attachment is so easy to understand when it’s about money; seeing it is, for some reason, more difficult when it’s about our hidden sense of well-being.